(no subject)
tonight i prayed for the usual. To die in my sleep. I hope it works this time and i can finally be happy
starvemaxxing
i NEED to be pretty and skinnier and maybe if i starve myself more i'll become less sick
im already starting a supplement diet. that should be good enough.
im already starting a supplement diet. that should be good enough.
(no subject)
i cant commit to kpop diets because theyre all so strict as in just same food, same time, same thing. i dont like that.
im really sleepy.
i forgot what i was going to type tbh
im really sleepy.
i forgot what i was going to type tbh
(no subject)
"youre pouting in your sleep, i'm waking still yawning were proving to each other that ROMANCE IS BORING!!!"
(no subject)
i dont even know how to feel, i just want to sleep. i dont really want him to come back because i know he'll just blame all his mental issues on me and get mad at me again and again and again and again. "make it work" my ass when u run away every 3 months you get to assume and speak on how i feel. i feel angry, i feel bitter. i feel sad. but i dont get to feel that do i? because it isnt "normal"
im going to
im going to starve my emotions away again, i hate having to feel i hate this hate this hate this!!
gotta build
i have to rebuild my doll-like image. i have to be perfect, i have to be perfect again i have to iu have to be perfect afgain i have to be perfecytagain
im sorry
your right in front of me but ur silence feels like the cold shoulder, i feel scared to say how i feel because i feel like you wouldnt even care. im scared if i express how i feel i'll no longer be "perfect". i always bottle it up all for you, you dont need to know how i feel or my opinions or what i like. why would you? what would be the point? so you can see me for who i am? "human" and flawed to the bone? never. never ever ever.
